nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
once he started yelling at me in latin, i wasn't sure what we were fighting about anymore...
All I remember from last night is puking up a box of cheeze-its and the building catching on fire.
i wish i could google "things to eat in my fridge" so i wouldnt have to go downstairs and be disappointed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Fuck the gym. I just shaved m'cooch and my pants now fit looser.... Dont judge me.
I feel like vodka or no vodka, you'd still be trying to button your cat into your comforter
Banging bitches in a bar bathroom is not legit as it was in college, there are no fistpumps afterward only shame
So many lesbians keep hitting on me. I'm about to give up and just go home with the manliest one.
She kept biting his ear when he was talking to people, that was only 3 drinks in...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You fucked her?! HER?!
She sent me a nudie pic with a bunch of weed nuggets all over her tits...what was I supposed to do? I don't hate America sir.
I WILL BE THE BEST FICTITIONAL HISTORICAL FIGURE FOR THE FEMENIST MOVEMENT THE WORLD HAS EVER SEEN
We should give each other good-luck-on-your-finals head in the morning.
If it meant we had chicks like that every weekend I would gay marry the shit out of you dude
I just want a boyfriend who will have sex to Disney Pandora.
And now to play every stoner's favorite game: Where the Fuck Did We Park the Car?! Disneyland Edition!
Randomize