Same here... Well I was planning on having some sort of deep conversation, but looking at how grim of an outlook tomorrow has on you, I'll just re-inform you that I have your pants.
chugging beers on the train. people are staring. I would be offended if it wasn't 8:30
The drug dealer had chickens in his house so I know it was good stuff.
If magic marker is safe for kids, it should be safe for cats...right?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I literally walked into the toilet, looked at my reflection, said "alcohol" and went back to bed...
Pretty good. They took the stitches out but it still hurts like a bitch. The doctor says I should be off crutches by next week.
Well, that's good. Let's hope drunk you doesn't sabotage you.
You're 31, how do you still outdrink all these college kids?
Practice, Irish genes, and a lack of desire to live past 40. But mostly practice.
When I woke up next to him on the living room floor, my glasses were broken and it felt like someone rubbed a cactus all over my vag
I don't know what the bubonic plague feels like- but I'm gonna guess its something like this.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wonder what dick looks like without astigmatism?
I'll accept that I'm a woo girl. Just not the drunk cowboy hat wearing bar mongering twat bag type
If sending nudes to tinder boy is considered functional then yes.
I know I'm drunk but why am I receiving this handjob through the pant leg of my shorts..?
i need you to come over and tell me if you can notice that i'm only wearing a teddy underneath my trenchcoat
I just found an old slice of LIME in my wallet?????????
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