i spent 15 mins trying to take money out of ATM with my drivers license saying, "what the fuckkkk" everytime it didnt work
i made two phi delts show me their dicks in less than 30 words! Take that twitter!
Just facebooked the guy whose name you're yelling in there. So you're aware, his interests include "swearing at babies" and "Ice luge"
I love how kegs are figured into our monthly bills
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Great. I get laid, Leslie Nielsen dies. I can't have have sex anymore, the film community can't take another loss like this.
i just had a pap smear and two shots. lets hit the beach.
I just watched dragonflies fucking. You can't match that level of geek.
He drives a BMW. I have to fuck him. Girl Code Rule #26.
He just told an 8 year old to go fuck himself so we probably won't be in the butterfly exhibit much longer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude. Get me out of here. I'm surrounded by glitter-faced 40 year olds in halter tops. The desperation here is so thick you can taste it.
I am the slutty bisexual glue that holds this friendship group together.
He was rocking just a diaper, shoes, and a gun. Sadly, I would still hit it.
You're 21st was epic. I woke up at 6 a.m. on the floating beer pong table in the pool with a beer still in hand. Didn't even spill any
God gave you your own nipples for a reason.
he asked me for a magic BJ...is that supposed to be different from a normal BJ?
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