In all seriousness though I just found out the dog pissed in my bed it'd be nice to crash somewhere other than my couch while my piss soaked bedding is in the washer
my mother just offered to pay for my fake id.
i woke up this morning to a slap on the ass and jake saying "you should let me put it in your ass now" i need out of this relationship.
for sure. did you let him do it?
thats not the point.
So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my little sister told my dad she found willy wonka's golden ticket in the backseat of my car. now my dad knows my boyfriend uses magnums.
sitting in room practicing taking shots. has my life come to this?
I cut you off after you tried to do a shot out of a neti pot, down your nose.
explains the nose bleeds.
Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
just got my tax refund and at bell. how do you say i want a grand worth of 5 layer burritos in spanish?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Her gay brother kept hitting on me and cockblocking me. Don't even begin to tell me how bad your night was.
Heading to the gym, the one that guy said he goes to. Already checked online, his class is at 5. And no, this isn't too much after meeting him last night. Stop judging me,
hey i found one of your nipple clamps under my couch, i miss you!
We were Chugging coronas for the soul purpose of launching limes out of the 3rd story window, I'd say it was a good weekend
You know it's been a rough week when you funnel beers by yourself.
Moms passed out wet and naked in a rocking chair again....
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