Ok just saw a girl open a pillbox, dump it out on her notebook and count out 13 adderall tabs and put them in a baggie and leave. Oh hey college.
the best part is my dad got arrested for the same thing at the same bar 30 years ago... so he cant be mad
I felt kinda bad after screaming 'ITS MY BIRTHDAY TOO' while he was having a seizure in the front of the party bus.
Shes definitely an expert at this. Her happy hour goes from 4 to 11, then she starts drinking heavy. She also allots 15 minutes each hour for a pee/bj break
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is your answer to that text seriously a right parenthesis
Only thing I got out of his drunken Spanish is something that sounded like "pencil sharpener." Damn rosetta stone.
Here's the thing, you got road head in two different cars tonight. You feel lucky yet?
She asked if i could guess "what shape her carpet was". I got it wrong (christmas tree).
He was making Jim beam nachos. Chips soaked in whiskey with cheese
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Have you ever had chicken nuggets while high? Because it tastes like hearing the Beatles for the first time
She's licking the whiskey out of the carpet. I think we may be soulmates.
Do you ever get high and look at your cat and feel like you know them on an intellectual level?
I woke up and my pants were in the kitchen but my shoes were next to my bed. Do the math...
PSA- Wearing assless chaps results in embarrassingly painful sunburn
Dude my toilet did not deserve what I just did to it
Randomize