He muttered something about having just washed he sheets, then demanded I give him all my quarters.
There is a guy standing at my bar right now wearing an affliction SUIT. I can't wait on him.
Well its official I'm an idiot. I made out hardcore with an employee last night in our banquet room. Oh and got wasted at work. Oh and showed my staff squirrel on a trampoline.
It's hard for me to sext him when the picture i see on my phone when he texts me is his facebook default of him and his girlfriend.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my voice of reason is faarrr too drunk for me to listen.
It's chlamydia! Thank God!
she keeps giving me cups of everbeer.. its everclear and beer mixed. i guess its blackout or backout time
Let's have sex soon. Just us!! Its sad that I have to specify.
This guys mom bought us a 24 pack and drove me and 8 others to a frat house... Hello moms weekend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
At least I remembered to wear a bra. I feel like that's a big accomplishment right now
Pulling on my sock literally just took me 5 minutes.. The hangover is real
I'm sorry that running around town like a frenetic wombat trying to find you KY jelly isn't good enough for you.
He had a small dick anyway. I'm glad I barfed on it.
After 8 hours of circus trick sex, his parents are both hugging me and kissing me on the cheek asking when I'm coming back over. Score?
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