I puked off the balcony.
Not horrible
Into the hottub. There were six people in it. I had eaten all their pizza.
Your noise violation report contains the word "five-some"...wtf happened in here?
I don't know. I guess at the end of the day I wanted taco bell more than a boyfriend.
Totally get that.
When I like her vacation photos, it really means "Im sleeping with your boyfriend." wonder if she will make the connection.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
is it too much to get a jumbo margarita in a sippy cup right now?
Your 'drink of the future' makes sense now- you feel it for atleast 10 hours into the future
what customs doesn't know wont hurt them
I dont care if he cant spell. Illiterate people need blowjobs too
Yikes. I usually have a 24-hour waiting period between sex partners. You know, like for a handgun.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have stripper ass cheeks all over my glasses
thank god we only have to drink eggnog and rum once a year. It taste like shit.
He is what would appear if the douche troop all had rings and we summoned someone like the Captain Planet kids.
Any residual attraction has just been ruthlessly murdered by that mustache.
We just had an accidental Facebook titty pic scare.
He called me 'pal' while complimenting how well I took his load on my face. I've officially been fuckbuddy-zoned.
Randomize