u know ur in oregon when the cop tells u to keep the beer cans he made u pour out so u can recycle them
We can get Dustin to help us. I think he'd be good at luring girls into a dark alley.
I just don't understand how my upright asian catholic roommate is getting more than me.
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Showerbowl immediately followed by pullups naked. I feel like fucking Tarzan
I'm pretty sure getting a blow job behind a bar in Rome while her little sister is throwing up in a dumpster not 5 feet away, gives entirely new meaning to the phrase "When in Rome"
You're getting a blowjob this afternoon. This has been your morning public service announcement.
We can add pilot to the list of people who's lives I've changed...with my penis.
could you please explain to me why my jumper cables are on my bedroom floor?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Woke up in my underwear and Christmas sweater. Only. Eggnog has won the battle but not the war.
Is it too early to say this year has been a blur?
his version of basketball was throwing hot sauce packets down my cleavage at taco bell at 2 am with his buddy.the cashier kept score
This ER has an aquarium in it!!!
Personally, if my roommate had a nice friend who made me dinner, gave me free beer, a 4am meal, a couch to sleep on in an apartment on the beach, and breakfast when I woke up, and I found out that said roommate was fucking her, I'd be all... right on! She's cool! Thanks for the quesadillas!
...I just added shower water to my vodka on ice\n#sendhelp
Randomize