I'm not crazy, I only keep calling you cause you won't pick up.
I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
its like he missed a chap in the "being a guy" handbook and read the bible instead
until you tell me otherwise ill assume we're playing "cavity search" the homeland security game to spice up our sex life
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why does he only make me orgasm when I'm about to break up with him?
I basically get to watch her life fall apart via tumblr updates
I know this request is pointless but you two please try to keep the drinking and drug use to a minimal, I have bail money so write my number on your arm and a "if found call", wear a life jacket and act like a responsible 28 year old please.
I'm going to go out on a limb and say last night was a success, also the neighbors are counting down the days until we move out.
There was a half eaten cheeseburger on my coffee table. Guess I made it to McDonald's.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was spooning with the dog when I came home. Now shes afriad to go near him. Should I ask?
I'll be home next weekend. Its mothers day. Let's party just enough so we are frightened it might be our first
A 'Bear Fight' is a car bomb followed by a Jaeger bomb. Fuckface and I do those on slow days. Tonight, we did a 'Polar Bear on Fire'. Fireball, a bear fight in the middle, and end with rumple minze.
I made friends at the beach bars tonight. Several were worried for my well being.
What did the sign say that bob stapled to his ass?
she grabed my junk and started making lightsaber noises
I wonder if you could get her in a metal bikini
Liz Cheney wasn’t exactly on my list of women I expected to be saying “YAS QUEEN” for in 2021 but here we are
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