they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
If it makes you feel any better I'm plucking my mustahce and drinking. Alone.
sometimes i wonder what i would do without sheltered catholic girls w/ overprotective parents
never have sex?
I'd just like to give a shout out to jesus and plan b for making this day possible.
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My dick was almost in plain McDonald's sight
Every time I someone I meet again from that wedding it turns into the "Oh your the guy who puked in the hallway and passed out in front of the elevator."
I'm surprised, it's been so long you must be starving
At a certain point, the zombie-like hunger goes away. Then the sadness sets in. Then you start lying to yourself that you're taking some "me time." Then you remember you dodged chlamydia and Buddha knows what else. Then you're at peace with it.
The girl next to me looks like the young version of sara (bonnie hunt) in jumanji. I wanna be like PLAY THE GAME SARA!!!!"
He wanted me to come over on Christmas...inviting your fuck buddy over for the holidays is just something you don't do.
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I'd do them all but honestly I'm so high that I probably should have a chaperone.
you weren't there so I had to flirt with him on your behalf
I keep track of what day of the week it is by my recent destinations on my nav system. \nRight now it's: booty call, bar, booty call, brunch, bar, church so that must mean we are getting close to Sunday when we start the rotation all over again.
So I decided to sleep with him for the first time in months so I can convince him it's his kid instead of the other guy
The economy cant be that bad, I willingly got fired to bang her again.
Worst sex ever! He was a talker for sure! I was on top and out of no where he said "Oh you bad bitch?" I stopped and left.
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