great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
You gave him head? He fingered you? A little bit of make out?
WHAT THE FUCK ITS LIKE YOU WERE THERE
Sharpest. Poop. Ever.
it feels good to walk into a CVS and not go straight to the pharmacy counter for plan b. its been a while....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
A slipped finger up the butt isn't the end of the world
I love waking up with his head head between my legs, it makes me feel special
I feel like hell. The amount of black beans I found in my hair tells me I hit rock bottom
His ankle bracelet went off in the middle of sex. That makes a girl reevaluate her life...
Question: should I be considering heels or is this the kind of night where I should plan on falling on my face regardless of my choice of footwear?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
God, you're amazing. I just want to hang out with you in the nude and watch Monty Python movies whilst we quip about how comedians just aren't as funny anymore.
Credit for originality. Points off for a mild to moderate creepy factor.
They just built a gym in the same parking lot as my favorite bar. Drunk me is gonna be so excited.
I haven't had to masterbate since I started dating him over a year ago. I don't even know if I remember how and my vagina is calling.
I had one beer! ONE BEER! They took shots in mourning of my tolerance last night. My ability to drink is a joke.
he called me 'mate' and i had to remind him that you dont call people mate who continously make your dick hard
People like you and me aren't meant to go this long without having sex
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