you kept searching pizza on facebook and becoming a fan of each page dedicated to it
How long is it safe to eat only Hot Pockets and Popsicles?
i like to finish this college football season knowing that not once have I had to masturbate to erin andrews
my life is about to be the like the hunger games except with penises. and im going to win.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i told myself when i was 16 i would never fuck an Alan. now i've fucked 3 and i'm punching my 16-year-old self in the face
I had to ask. I mean when you get a snap chat of a nipple you have to ask who's it is.
the first cop to show up was this girl who hooked up with our home ec teacher in high school, she knows about questionable decisions
Well I can't be held accountable to know every which time you slid a finger here or slid a finger there. I'm way too busy getting close to climaxing to document these things.
I can recall having this conversation with a three year old, but go on
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You said, "I'll have this whole island inside of you by 6 AM. Just point out who you want and I'll make it happen."
It finally happened. Some guy just tried to catfish me with my own dick pic. Of course I told him that it was the hottest dick I'd ever seen and that I would do anything for that particular dick.
If you're gonna show up unannounced on hangover day, you better have coffee doughnuts and a boner
In what world does 'I'm awake' at 2:30 in the morning on a wednesday translate to 'let's fuck' in the span of one text? Where has the romance gone?
Maybe those shots of hot dog water wasn’t a good idea after killing a fifth of tequila.. but who’s askin
the orange of my hangover Tang is hurting my eyes... my coworkers knew it was hangover Tang too.
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