Why are there hot girls at the dollar store?
The recession has changed everything man.
i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
he was like a christmas ornament you would hang on the back of the tree....not great but still made the cut.
I was holding her hair back and when she quit puking she told me she's been saving her scissor virginity for me.
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So after I was tied with a feather boa he left me there with KFC and cherry coke
I just had a brazillian performed by a hungarian named olga. Im pretty sure she was trying to rip out my soul. You owe me a million orgasms
He made a fake guest pass that was just a note card with "I'm here. Me." written in sharpie, and tried to convince the security guard it was real.
If we worried less about pouring champagne down stripper crack, we probably wouldn't skip so many meals.
We went to the casino to try to earn enough money to go to new Orleans comfortably. I'm already drunk. This is a horribly immoral start to summer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also, upon examining the photos, I have concluded that you were the sloppiest drunk girl of the night. And that's saying something considering Hurricane Jessica was in town.
I have a theory that years from now they will be with women who despise me because of what I trained their husbands to like.
I would reevaluate a bf who is happy with other guys doing me.
Sext me about skeletons
Cocaine is ok on a cleanse, right?
You know those times when you're sitting down for a while and r like damn I'm sober but then stand up and r like WOAH HOLD UP.
Randomize