Our house smells like week old pizza, beer cans, cigarettes, and depressing career tracks....get lysol.
I smoked weed with pregnant girl. I'm going to hell.
So i guess i slapped the girl sitting next to me leg and said "You know what they say, got fat legs...you gotta fat BOX"
He tried to say the picture wasn't him. Like I'd forget his curved boner.
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I've had more sex in the two weeks since we broke up than I ever had in any two weeks we were together.
i cant wait to be back in my element of drunk, on a barstool, ive missed home
Is it too forward to say "stop being a good friend and start being a good fuck buddy"
You need to come back and help me drink our beer so the fridge has room for the other beers
Wrapped in a blanket, just ate a whole party pizza. All my dreams are coming true and you don't even care.
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She tried to beat him up using a half gallon of Bacardi, instead she got tangled in Kayla's hanging bra and broke a lamp. She can party with us anytime.
Haha, maybe if he wasn't dressed up like Kimmy Gibler he could give her the D
Had to decide between a hook up at the train restroom or getting to work on time #growingup
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
I may not have my dignity, pride or sanity but I have my pants.
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
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