It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
just woke up in my neighbors garage.
scratch that. I'm like 6 miles from my house in a random garage.
How many times can you lose to your mom in beer pong before you can no longer show your face around campus?
I told him I wanted to have sex to "halleluiah", he suggested the poke-rap.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I met the perfect girl for you, she's smart, likes cars, has at least one ear, and really blue eyes!
please elaborate on, "atleast one ear"
Code red. She won't talk to me. Maybe it has something to do with her raccoon eyes. Perry said there was a brief moment of towel fighting until you passed out. Did you draw the turtle on my ass?
These shoes are way too nice for a walk of shame. Its how I keep myself in line.
Hey I know you're not home, but I'm here. Your front door is unlocked and someone took shit on your doormat...
i liked you for your lack of ambition and abundance of weed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I definitely tried to pay a cab with baseball tickets last night
I want to fling myself into the sun
I can't hangout tonight, I have a phone sex appointment at 10
RICK BROUGHT THE HOT BARTENDER HOME. SOMEONE CALL THE FIRE DEPARTMENT, CUZ RICKYS ON FIIIIIIIRE.
lmao nvm she punched him in the face and left
Dude, you screamed I AM THE WALRUS while giving a statue of Ronald McCdonald a lapdance. You were NOT sober.
It went from a "chill game of beer pong" to "absinthe body shots and a tits parade" in literally two minutes.
Told you inviting her was a good idea.
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