I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
Whenever I miss you I just turn on Tool Academy
I am in the hospital with a broken wrist because a guy told me that if I punched him it "wouldn't hurt." it hurt. me. Thank you 11 jello shots.
He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.
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I love that my brother has just convinced my dad that smoking a blunt it an "unspoken family tradition"
Time to do stuff I know I'll have to hide from my grandkids one day and everyone at next weekends wedding.
I am eating deep fried cinnamon rolls and I found a lighter in my sprinkles. I miss you.
I am the prescription. I can be taken orally or vaginally and in any dosage. This is why I went to med school.
Well, we could've been at the bar taking a shot everytime my rash spread. But Noooooo. You had to go out with your non- girlfriend. Lame.
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"Little drunk?" Honey you were "livetweeting" Sublime's "Sublime" album while it was playing in his car, and at one point you said you hoped they play Santeria. "Little drunk" doesn't cover it.
I wish I were single again so I could actually have sex.
Wait, but now I'm curious. In what position were y'all when the cops came? Were you guys butt ass naked in the car? 😂😂
Disclaimer- Don’t worry about my wounded nip. I put a bandaid on it.
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
I'm sitting in the car vaping at an elementary school to try and deal with the stress of existing. About how i thought being 30 would go for me tbh
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