don't read that magazine bro. I came in it
You can't like Harry Potter and Twilight. You have to pick. Vampires and Wizards are mutually exclusive.
i was concerned for your health after you took your "last shot" four times...
Fuck men. I'm going to go eat a package of cookie dough and get fat. I hope I die of salmonella.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Who would win... a chainsaw pooping pterodactyl or a bear with machine guns for feet. big debate about this right now
My mouth holds just enough water for my bong
you kept yelling "this bitch stole my phone" to the guy who found you passed out in the parking lot
At one point, you closed your eyes and asked me which 'six flags' we were at
Dude. Her vagina is a blender.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just applied for assistance with paying my hospital bill from my alcohol poisoning at age 16 while still a little drunk from last night. What is my life.
Circle of life?
We went rollerblading down high street singing "Free Falling"in ketchup and mustard costumes. A car full of guys drove by and yelled out their window "Need a hot dog with that?!" Naturally, we woke up at their apartment.
Also, do you think i could get away with finishing my vodka cranberry from last night at work if i put orange juice in it? Serious question.
Sometimes I just want to kiss you without you pulling ur cock out and waving it at me
On the upside, no one went to the hospital! Lex's friend was definitely on fire at one point last night though because he tried to juggle tiki torches. He was shirtless this morning and smelled like a BBQ.
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
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