its like he missed a chap in the "being a guy" handbook and read the bible instead
I'm pretty sure if an eight year old calls you a whore.. it's true. just saying.
I hope his life after cheating on me is as good as Tiger's golf game is these days.
we were shitfaced at work by 8pm. I had to stop myself from pouring vodka in everyone's cappuccino.
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DON'T LET IAN EAT HIS PEANUT BUTTER!!!
Just remembered that I poured a whole bottle of tylenol in there. It's chunky. It's deadly.
hey dude come in here and see how much of my beard i can put in my mouth!
KETAMINE SUNDAYS ARE SERIOUSLY FUCKING ME UP!
Bunch of Navy warships just sailed into New York Harbor for Fleet Week. Nobodys getting laid this weekend.
Drunk life lesson just learned the hard way: do not try to play hump the great dane. He may take you up on it.
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Ugh I can't even look at alcohol this weekend, my body needs to heal.
Just killed a snake in my bed! And by killed I mean hit repeatedly with my fist. And by snake I mean a lump in the covers. And I pissed my pants.
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
My tights ended up on the driveway folded neatly. Any ideas how that happened?
I pour the whiskey from now on
So is he the one who got away?
They all got away. I’m a catch and release kind of girl.
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