There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
When I told my boss I'm using a vacation day for 4/20, he gave me his personal cell phone number and winked at me.
the nurse was shocked when I handed her a cup of green piss. what did she expect giving me a drug test on st. patty's day?
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
fyi gin and iced coffee...not my greatest invention
My arms are still sore. Apparently, lube wrestling is the best workout ever.
Yeah I'm at work. Nothing like the threat of blowing chunks on passing cars to make you feel alive.
It's national "dress up your pet day" come over. Drugs and dressed up cats..it's the shit dreams are made of.
You've got until 8 and then I'm kicking down your door and pouring a beer down your ass via funnel
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She answered the door wearing a basket, said it was the only clean thing she had.
Tis the season to play Pocahontas! (AKA: Eat a bunch of acid and run around the yard barefoot, the first person to see the colors of the wind, wins!)
I'm eating go-gurt and drinking beer alone in the dark. This is why you shouldn't marry young.
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
She was screaming and crying about how she couldn't find her middle finger. Then, she threw her body on to the pavement. Thats the last time we buy a freshmen a handle.
I have a mailbox and I don't know why.
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