i'm not going because i feel like it's just gunna be a "this is your life" who i banged this years addition
Theres someone in the car behind me eating corn on the cob & talking on the phone
i only understood the part that said mucho orgasmos
Well I tried to steal a golf cart. I fought with the Chick-Fil-A cow. And other things.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude, you cant keep using "she roofied me" as an excuse to bang all these fat chicks
i think he spiked my sandwich with a viagra
I am coping with the snow storm with beer and shots of jack. If I were outside in shorts I might be able to pass as a Canadian.
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
My phone autocorrects "pooping" to "popping" and I'm like DO YOU EVEN KNOW ME??!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Iron Man just asked me back to his place... Not sure I can handle this. Wish me luck.
You put on a bike helmet, yelled "doesn't matter fuck it" then punched a stick the fire
I'm gonna celebrate Valentines day by watching Bob Ross videos and tripping balls.
Why are there 17 orders of shrimp lo mein in the bathtub?
Finally fucked my buddy's mom!! We are both ten years older and for her it really shows but i hit it!!
Do you think he will let me wear my neck fan while he throws my back out?
Please shut the fuck up.
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