Ok pretty sure I just saw Mike O'Malley walking through the parking lot. I wanted to see if I followed him, would he lead me to the acro-criag, i've always wanted a crack at that bitch.
just took a pee in my own yard...decided i had to poo..only got a dingle berry....wiped it away with my finger..help me...my mom AND dad are home.
sorry about last night, I don't know what happened but I woke up this morning and looked strikingly similar to courtney love, it had to be bad.
She woke me up, whispered "I like the size of your dick", kissed me, and rolled over and went back to sleep
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm too hungover to be in a fucking cow suit right now
I'm on my fifth double. This night is getting better whether it likes it or not.
he rubbed his balls on my face to wake me up.. this friends with benefits thing is getting out of hand.
What's life without a lamp shade you wore home?
I'll send you the picture of you double fisting vodka bottles, grinding one guy and making out with another... Every girl wanted to be you.. You make me so proud!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm wearing too many socks to be ok with this.
I just want to make out with him forever
Oh, and let me go get some popcorn, watching you make your own decisions should be quite the shitshow.
Just paid for my STD meds using a giftcard I got for Christmas. Thanks mom.
I would definitely ride that dick into the sunset if nuggets are involved
You know how fear has a smell? Well turns out shame has a smell too. It's Pina colada flavored anal grease.
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