i swear to god her finding her clit was like looking for a sock in a dryer full of beach towels
I need a creepy friend to scare off the other creepy people
I would be honored to be that friend.
Just used your umbrella as a puke sheild. Thanks man.
This dude. Just lost. A finger. He asked us for tape.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just so everyone's clear, it was already on fire when I got there.
Oh I woke up in my neighbors garage using one of their sleeping bags, as my neighbor was doing laundry in there.
come find me. Outside the bar we were just in waving my syringe in the air
Yeah bro I don't know how she's gonna explain the black eye, how else do you tell your boss "my knee hit me in the face during sex last night"
I just looked at a girl and was like what disease does she have? And then my mind caught up ohhh shes pregnant.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm currently being signed up to be painted nude for a college art class. ah yes best high decision ever
It's going to be so weird waking up tomorrow morning fully rested completely sober and not covered in piss or bruises.
They were so huge my eyes were just drawn to them. Boob gravity man.
I have a strong contender for the new number 1 position for fwb. He met me at the door with pizza and a shot of patron
How do you make a Facebook status saying how much you fucking hate yourself without being aggressive enough for people to worry about your safety
Cuz that's where I'm at
wow wtf man i was the friend bailing you out of jail with 500 cash and you didnt have the common courtesy of waking me up for class when i passed out drunk and naked in the bath tub
Randomize