I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't.
The make-up sex just reminded me why we broke up in the first place.
Well, both are illegal but one involves my vagina a whole lot less.
He soundtracked our prebreakup sex, our breakup, and out postbreakup sex. At least he's dedicated.
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OH GOD PAJAMAS ARE SUCH A HARD CONCEPT RIGHT NOW
The a/c is broken so they cut a softball size whole in the freezer door. Goodbye deposit.
Sun* burn. But that sounds like wait.. Midsentence thought... It would be like swimming in a giant bowl of cereal.. Only I would be cereal. This is brilliant.
yeah its nbd she just bit me in the face. be there soon
The 78 year old woman who works next to me divorced her ex husband, remarried her first husband, and retired all in one day. I'd say it makes your breakup on Valentine's day pretty insignificant.
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My aunt comes over, haven't seen her in 4 years. First thing, looks me up and down and goes "...yup, that pair ripened nicely. Theyll get you some free drinks"
I think you were raised by the wrong sister
I'm in my bed. Snow angles in fresh sheets. don't even try to get me out tonight.
I spent the last 6 months operating under the assumption that I HADNT fucked a paramedic. I was wrong.
HOLY FUCK I almost floated out of the city. Thank god my dog kept me down.
Right?? Give me some apple scented candles and I'm a fall wet dream
See I insist I'm not a groupie and then I say things like "will bang for a backstage pass".
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