Why can't I find a man that likes bush instead of a vagina that looks like it belongs to a prepubescent child!
Because men are children
Touche
So I woke up today with someone's door knob in my pocket. I hope everbody else got out of the house ok.
either she was really happy we won flip cup, or she was too drunk to notice her boyfriend behind her.
It was at that moment that I realized I was alone. Alone and drunk on an Epcot ride.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think they called the cops after 15 minutes of you shaking their clothes line like the ultimate warrior and calling out hulk hogan
Shots and making dong molds for my gf's friends. Typical Monday night activities.
No, you always delete them without reading. Enjoy the virtue of morning innocence. What are you doing today.
You were stoned out of your mind. We were eating cold cuts and you wouldn't shut up about how it was the wettest meat you'd ever felt in your life.
Why is there soup literally in every orifice of my body?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently that big girl from last night tried to take me upstairs when I was blacked out and all I did was grab Qs arm and whisper 'don't let her take me'
So our trip to Disney World ended in the three of us stripping at a gay club in orlando.
My soul is telling me that I need to take this exam naked.
I'm driving to his house to eat chicken and hopefully have an orgasm
You can be responsible and still be on that ho life
Oh. Why can't it be something easy, like a punch card for blowjobs?
Randomize