She has a t-rex face on a stuart little body.
he has a girlfriend so we used my stuffed animals to pretend to have sex
I want to give my boyfriend great head for his birthday...can i practice on you?
sweet and enthusiastic is code for tiny dick.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
an off duty cop drove behind me last night to make sure i didnt get a dui. i was blacked out drunk and on a pill of ecstacy. he knew this. i must be really pretty.
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
Just ran interference for her again. Sometimes i wonder how many times in my life i'll have to be a cock block at the clinic
He held me the entire night. Not endearing kind of way. Like kidnapping or held hostage kind of way.
I jerked him off and then punched him in the face for no reason. Typical evening drinking Sailor Jerry's.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was dressed as a cowboy and he was dancing with my ex roommate. So I took his gun and pistol whipped him with it..then somehow we still slept together..
There is pretty much a target on everyone's lips when I am drunk. EVERYONE
At least I'm fat on the outside. You can NEVER change being fat on the inside.
Reminding you of hookups your brain is trying to suppress. That's what friends are fooooooooor...
He put his number in my phone as Steve handsome
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
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