I just came out of my doctor's office and i look into the window and i see a guy sitting in the front seat getting head.
why are you so shocked? you live in brooklyn.
Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
What's your middle initial? I need it for the census. I put us down as "unmarried partners."
Oh my god... you're gay. Ps, its A.
No no. According to the 2010 US Census, we're gay.
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She gave me a blow job and her mom gave me blueberry muffin afterwards. I love them.
you know you have a brother who cares when he hands you a piece of pizza before you pass out from too many bong hits
I take your giggles as a yes to operation McLaxitives?
diet's not working. come over. i need someone to fuck the hungry out of me.
After I was arrested and in the back of the squad, she lit a cig. I politely stuck my head through the glass opening and asked for a drag. She instantly slammed my head back, blew smoke at me and shut the glass. My view on state trooper chicks is forever tainted.
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Saw a girl lying on her back next to a fire hydrant. Not sure if passed out drunk or sleeping under the stars
wait nvm its a dude
SOMETIMES YOU HAVE TO BLAST VANESSA CARLTON IN YOUR CAR AT MIDNIGHT TO FEEL AGAIN. IDK.
Then you guys just all showered together...?
There is a moment when you wake up with a butt plug in when you question your choices in life.
There is also a moment when you wake up in a kiddie pool of jello cubes where you question what the fuck you did last night. Are you still in the attic or did you go home.
I just wanna be naked and go frolic in the snow
Just made a secret hand shake with my sisters cat. Boredom at its finest.
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