I mean I like that it's warm enough to open the windows, but it annoys me that I can't walk around naked anymore.
having to delete all your hookups stored in your phone as first name followed by frat/bar after they've graduated is such a bittersweet feeling
Please come pick me up? I sleep walked to planned parenthood again.
I booked us a cruise for November. Lose 20 pounds and don't cheat on me before then.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Don't play hard to get, I've seen some of the girls you've slept with.
We're lucky we aren't prostitutes by now. Whats the etiquette for returning a pair of heels with blood on them?
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
i ordered a pipe on amazon, and under recommended items, it gave me a top hat. it knows me better than my parents.
Just got escorted to my 7:45 class by an old woman because I was too hungover to not realize I was four floors too high.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Idk dude but he said something bout his "dick was gonna be so tan" then he jus jumped out of the car
You are under a naked attack watch for the whole weekend. Shelter in place.
He texted me at 3am that you cut your hand at the bar and were bleeding all over.
I woke up to a text thinking you bled out at a bar, turns out you got your butthole licked.
I just laughed so hard that my back cracked so hard that I thought I was cumming. Magic
We met up and made out in front of an empanada spot, if that's not romance then idk what is.
I have unfollowed so many people the only things showing up in my newsfeed are dog rescues and sloth memes
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