why is every porn film shot in the same house? with the same red couch!?!
sometimes i wish i could just stick a turkey baster up there and suck out the blood
So I just walked into the bathroom, and there was this kid, talking to his mom, while taking a shit. I flushed the toilet next to him and heard him say into the phone, "No, I'm not. I'm in my dorm."
she was using a pencil to fish crushed adderall out of a plastic bag. it was like a college version of fun dip
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just funneled a beer through a mask n snorkel.. can you check that off my bucket list..
How do you tell someone they are only invited if they put out?
I just got eleven picture messages of my dick and balls hanging out of my shorts last night. I guess it really is summer when the fratastic, man-thigh exposing shorts come out...
Bro i heard that. I've seen so many balls this month its like march madness all over again
I lost count of how many people I peed on last night.
I guess I tried to show you how big my closet was and we ended up eating pickles in my bathroom
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He only had napkins in the bathroom... no toilet paper. If I fuck him, am I settling?
i would compare it to sliding down a velcro-covered fireman's pole naked. no more bearded men for me.
The bar would not accept my money. I have reached God status here
If I'm walking weird, don't judge me. Things got kinda outta hand with the GoPro on.
He just flipped the beer pong table and set the ceiling fan on fire things are about to get crazy
it's your last night here, let's make it one we may or may not remember.
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