But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
Just learned how to deliver a baby.the things i saw tonight can never be unseen
He tried to say "god bless your heart" to the stripper but it came out "god bless your pussy"
I've blown him while he hit my bong, I've blown him while he played video games and now I'm looking for a new challenge. Don't even try suggesting a blumpkin.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think I met somebody from your birthday this past weekend. He said I held a push up contest outside the bar and told them I would make out with the winner. He said he won..
Hungover, threw up in a cosmetic case in my car this morning. This is real life.
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
Somehow she talked me into getting my dick pierced, weird first date.
I feel like asking for a towel for after I puke before I puke to be more respectful than jus going outside to puke and coming back inside covered in sweat and tears.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She told him that she never wanted to see him again then took his takeout box of bacon cheddar fries and got in the uber saying "for feminism"
I'm sorry I called your mother a reasonably-priced receptacle.
Didn't realize he fucked me in a bed a dog is always in until my face swelled two sizes and I had hives all over my body. This is God's way of punishing me for having amazing sex.
Just realized that I bailed on you guys yesterday just so I could get wendy's. it was worth it but still, sorry
How's work going?
Boring. I have a cat on a leash right now
I used to want you to marry him...Now I just think you deserve a bigger penis than that.
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