dude i just heard a girl tell another girl 'what part of im trying to get laid tonight dont u understand?'
needless to say i wont be back home tonight
what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
If a video of someone that looks like me banging that chick on the hood of her car in some parking lot suddenly shows up on the web... let me know, I gotta see how that turned out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yea idk it was like early in the morning and you were walking around with no shoes carrying a printer
ive cried into many a lonely burritos..
Taco trucks are like ice cream trucks for drunk adults. They should have a mariachi tune they play super loud to bring people out of the bars for tacos.
Just woke up. Naked. Under an animal pelt. With a girl. I've never met her. She's pretty naked too.
Two of my roommates are waxing their vaginas in the living room. Can I come smoke?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I miss my teeeeeeeeth. They're in a bag in my hand.
I just ate apple sauce in my underwear. This isn't 30. This is 3.
I couldn't find my hair brush so I just brushed my hair with a cat brush. I should not be dating.
WHY are you masturbating to hockey fights?
Oh and sorry for almost killing all of us last night... twice...
Someone puked in my crockpot. Your friends can’t come over any more.
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