So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
Yeah i wasn't gonna go out but then i was like im not gonna get my dick wet stayin at home studying
is it sad that whenever i need to spell "independent" i still sing that one rap song?
She told me she couldnt give me head last night because she was running out of listerine
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm not a pervert.. I just like to be naked...
Why do you keep getting laid in MY dreams
everything was going well until edgar threatened to handcuff the security guard to himself.
I can't stream porn because Xbox live is taking all the Internet. I thought having a male roommate would make life easier.
You came home And decided to make beer battered bacon... That's why there was smoke
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I spent half an hours grinding with a drunk Harry Potter cosplayer at the con rave. Pretty sure I felt his wand.
Do you think there are other mothers looking at porn in the carpool line?
She took her panties off, then farted in my general direction. I guess we're at that stage in our relationship.
ok but bondage is pretty much my easy mode
I dont even know what happened i just remember waking up with beer cans outlining my body...
You're like a care bear with a big cock & a sexual prowess that would put the mighty Thor to shame.
Randomize