hook me up with the drugs dog keep up the good work
I don't think I can get bothered with getting laid tonight
Well, what part of "I've heard she has crabs" didn't you take into consideration?
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You know, it's scary to think that someday I might buy a pregnancy test with pride, not at 2am...
why weren't you at the audition last night?
booty call before role call
As I was puking last night I told them "it's ok I'm a paramedic"
I'm alone drinking at the bar and the titanic theme song is on. This won't end well.
I dont care if he cant spell. Illiterate people need blowjobs too
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Her throat is strong enough to gargle peanut butter. I'm sure you were satisfied.
Why did I wake up with condoms on all my fingers?
Considering the girl you hooked up with, I'd be concerned about not having one on your penis.
Maybe she'll change her mind but the "go fuck yourself" doesn't seem promising
We did it in the bar bathroom and the bathroom attendant sold us a condom. I love Nashville
i spent most of my hangover doing the math to figure out the last of the alcohol would be metabolized from my system.
thank you pre-med degree.
Sorry about peeing on your phone last night
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