I kept calling his name while we were having sex cuz i was so proud that i remembered it.
Meh. I'll learn enough German to ask her for a handjob, then I'm out
You never cease to amaze me.
Last night I walked out of the bar got in a cab asked the cabi to circle the block. he did and brought me right back to the bar. I paid him $7 thanked him and walked back into the bar.
dude, seriously he just sucked the milk out of the dogs breast and swallowed it... for $20, wtf....?
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My fave moment of today was you sitting in a hot pink innertube puking into the ocean in front of a lot of children. i would have held your hair back but the ocean did it for you.
She even gives head with a lisp.
I vaguely remember having a cowboy explain his belt buckle to me in the bathroom hallway
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
Because at some point last night we decided that shotgunning beers from a paint stick was a good idea
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I now have a bottom rung on my kissing scale. Like I can say "Well. On a scale of Matt to Braxton he was probably a Zach." It's the little things.
Dead. I am actually dead. Also, worst nightmare confirmed: throwing up in a four hundred person lecture.
There's just no proper way to thank a man for that many consecutive orgasims.
Should I apologize to him for saying I wanted to punch him in the face as I was digging through the trash?
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
Just fell down the stairs..might wanna call the ambulance jus take the weed out of my pocket be4 they come..
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