ran into someone who graduated hs with us while i was paying for booze in quarters. i love it when people from my past catch me in my classier moments.
We started making out, then he decided to get naked, put on a condom, and proceed to dry hump my leg, sweat pants and all, until he blew his load. I thought this was college. I immediatly left claiming I can't sleep in other people's rooms. He didn't even bother taking off my hoodie.
He's a firefighter, who has his own band. I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
I've never seen anyone write a check for a bar tab before
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm blazed about to take my 8am final. Another girl is too. We just looked each other in the eyes. She's my soul sister.
only in a texas roadhouse would someone whistle while I was breastfeeding.
He is what would appear if the douche troop all had rings and we summoned someone like the Captain Planet kids.
All I want to do is get high and needlepoint. Fuck your judgement
You were supposed to be my wingman and all you kept to her friend was "kill it with fire"..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Am I supposed to confront my 52-year-old boss/mother of 3 about the fact that we matched on Tinder?
I walked in and saw her crying and singing to her dog
Sorry. We had to leave because I knocked a guy out for saying "yolo".
He noticed my new Lipstick so later tonight it's going to be on his dick.
There's nothing wrong with using cocaine to keep my heart rate up in my fitness class.
Hey.... can you explain to me why when I woke up this morning my cell phone background had been changed to me getting a piggy back ride from a drag queen?
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