Ummmm the art teacher neighbor asked me to pose nude for her art class for cash.
Dude. I have been looking at your movie history on netflix and it is like looking at the rings of a tree. Only instead of telling me how old you are, it tells me when you were stoned.
We've only been driving for two hours and I'm already down 3 vicodin...I'm not going to survive this family vacation.
I don't know why I've never thought to take my bong into the bathtub before.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
Are you scared? I basically plan on us looking like giant drunk skittles
There needs to be a crayon color for how blue my balls are
Woman at starbucks on her computer with a garbage bag of popcorn and a bottle of lotion. Where are you coming from?!
They started shooting fireworks out of a dryer. It was my cue to leave.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He managed to rip my nipple last night....
He asked me how many starwars references he could make before i no longer find him attractive.
I collect Covid conspiracy theories like I collect Pokemon.
Just think how much she’ll hate me when she finds out I fucked her father
I don't wanna SLEEP with him, I want to start bar fights with him. There's a difference.
Just because I'm asexual doesn't mean I can't have a revenge fuck.
Randomize