Also I smoked away my sore throat last night. It's a 420 miracle.
Security said no more parties of this kind. To me that translates to Theme party this weekend.
she said I was laying next to a garbage can in the subway doing key bumps and screaming "its my fucking birthday" repeatedly
my hip hurts so fuckin bad. and I just found a half eaten burrito in my nightstand drawer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No, fuck buddies don't get birthday party privledges...
Sorry.
I bought 2 40s with winning lottery tickets and they paid me $.03. 'Merica
Just watched an entire Mariachi band walk of shame home together. Halloween at its finest
Someone just knocked jenga into a plate of cake. I'm licking off each piece one by one.
I would love a rich wife. Then I would be like a gym teacher or some shit. Bigfoot hunter maybe.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why must everything this weekend have to do with something going into or coming out of my vagina?
well my grandpa saw your dick pic, so why don't you tell me how my day is going
I'm done being drunk I wish I could snap my fingers and be sober
Oh shit that's not good dude. I'd head straight for Williamsport hospital the first ingredient in that shit is lithium batteries. You don't want to know what the second one is
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
He loves blowjobs.. were meant for each other.
Randomize