she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
Dude, we totally smoked up inside a church organ last night. Add this to the epic list.
He soundtracked our prebreakup sex, our breakup, and out postbreakup sex. At least he's dedicated.
Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she just pulled a hulk hogan to make her point. no idea how it helped
I don't know... But I do think this is probably the longest series of texts we've written discussing your cock. David was right, it is a brave new world. Also, slow day at work again?
I awoke this morning alone and naked in my bed I forecast my date later not going so well because I have three giant hickies on my neck there is a note next to my bed that looks a 3rd grader wrote it on my college acceptance letter
It's all fun and games until your AARP eligible neighbors end up blacking out in your yard at 5pm with a box of franzia. I'm feeling a great year ahead
At what point did you realize I was getting blown under the table during our dominos game?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm pretty sure his cum gave me swimmer's ear.
drunk and crying about Shakespeare- how's your night?
You can either drink his whiskey or be a bitch. Doing both is just mean.
I made a bucket list last night. Number 5: Will marry a wizard.
I twisted my ankle while drunkenly playing in my adult kickball league. Now I'm having to use my grandpa's cane to walk at this party. I am so single.
Put down the Captain Crunch and get over here. It’s a dickfest!!
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