He was all up on my grill like I was having a BBQ. I DONT EVEN KNOW HOW TO USE A GRILL.
You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
i just wanna skin you and wear you like last years versace.
you may have the big hair, fake nails, and talk with a fake accent, but you will NEVER be a housewife from new jersey so STOP TRYING.
and that's how I found out my dad doesn't believe in towels... holiday magic.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I swear every time I make the effort to make my hair look nice, someone jizzes in it.
sooo what's the appropriate music to listen to after you find out the dude you been fucking, is legit married with kids...what genre is that?
Really? Uh ohh sounds like a double date with extra stripper funnnn
Want to get high and go thrifting? I'm trying to succeed making my dorm look like a deranged Applebees.
Her fortune said that she will soon be free. She's taking her bra off at the table.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
WHY AM I THE ONLY ONE CONCERNED ABOUT THE SEAGULL IN THE OVEN
Is he the circus guy or the bi-curious street preacher?
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
Okay, the good news, found Jared, all IDs accounted for, Jack is meeting us at yours with your requested the delivery. The bad news: Lost Alice, banned from Stages, possibly fucked my TA in the bathroom.
YOU SLEPT WITH A GUY WHO HAS A BILLBOARD IN HIS HONOR?
And our sex soundtracks thus far have been metal and Star Wars
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