we were having sex in the shower and he dropped me. try explaining THAT to your concerned little brother
Why can't I find a man that likes bush instead of a vagina that looks like it belongs to a prepubescent child!
Because men are children
Touche
I didn't know it was possible to make picking up dog shit look sexy.
She did the bend and snap...
Fuck, now I'm not only the other woman, but the pregnant one
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude i have an english essay and a bio lab due tomorow
so basically your not goin out tonight?
who said that?
He's basically like a fancy dildo that buys me dinner.
Finding out he was uncircumcised by feeling his foreskin in my mouth was NOT ideal. New rule. Lights ALWAYS on.
Bartender just fed me brownie. Its going to be a good night
I swear that when we jog in the morning I can hear it slap between his thighs
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
SHE GRABBED MY FULLY ERECT DICK IN A BAR AND STUCK HER TONGUE DOWN MY THROAT AND I COULD NOT CLOSE
My tits, and hanging out behind a hotel eating pizza.
I was on my way last night when some asshole yelled "make better life choices" out the window of his car. I felt so self conscious I went home.
The fact that it was "anything but a cup" now explains the cowboy boots and fishbowl aftermath at the apartment.
he pulled my tampon string out with his teeth like a grenade pin yelling frag out! That's why I fuck guys back from deployment. They'll go the distance
last night you said that you wanted to hold my dick as you slept because it was like having a stuffed animal.
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