That's what you get when you play shuffleboard drunk.
he thought i was a dude.
kindergarten is hard when you're hung over.
The paper boy just woke me up in the front yard again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the bar tender told me i could keep an air matress in the backroom.
Didn't know hookah bars could end badly. I feel for her hair
how is it that I keep meeting up with you when Im drunk?
you stand on my porch screaming my name until I come out with you...
I think we've reached the point in the summer were we need to go back to school. I was so bored yesterday I nearly bought blow dart gun.
well considering the guy who just delivered my cookies had to console me as i had a mental breakdown in front of him i'd say i'm 4/10 right now, thank you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
someone stole all your weed so you told us you were planning each of our deaths
I'm gonna be the best dressed mother fucker to ever get kicked out of that damn bar.
I almost got an A in organic chem but started hallucinating during the final so I got a C
It tasted better than Jesus's hair.
He sent me a dick pic for every page I had to write for final papers (87) & brought me adderall. Tell me that isn't romance.
I should've left when he told me that he only smoked crack by accident once
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