Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
He threw up in a cup in the limo and when he got out the bouncer told him he couldn't bring drinks in so he gave the glass to that dumb girl we brought with us from c street.
I know, she tried to drink it
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
Annnnddddd this chick is using a hand puppet made of a sock to give her research presentation...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My cab driver just suggested I brush my teeth because he can smell "the party" on me.
She hash-tagged my name. I think it's safe to say that she remembers our hookup.
That would be an interesting position... Not entirely certain how that'd work!
Gravity is no match for my libido
Right now I'm standing in front of my fridge, drinking wine out of the bottle and eating cold steak with my hands. I am THE BEST at being single.
I am pretty sure we beat baby seals over the head in a past life. That is why we are being punished.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did we do anything stupid last night besides hook up with our ex girlfriends?
Look,the guy had sex w/a Canadian prison guard on the deck of a cruise ship,he could blow any second.
I just got a free round of shots. Don't you DARE fuckin tell me that A-cup boobs can't get you good things.
Just heard him in the middle stall. Sounded like someone emptied a toolbox into the toilet.
Still can’t get over the fact that we ate beef jerky off a strip club floor
A Valium induced mom decided to walk into my bedroom this morning without knocking. Guess what I was doing? FML
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