You can't be mad at me for wanting to drink though, it is the reason we're engaged
Promise me, at my funeral, you will re-enact our human sledding incident of 2011....you can use my dead body as said sled.
He didn't even realize I was drunk. He probably just thought I loved Torchwood so much that I no longer knew how to use my thumbs
"I'm 95% straight," he says. Cut to him on his knees...by far the most beautiful guy I've ever fucked.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up with my shoes still on and my pants around my ankles cause I couldn't get them over my shoes
I wore sunglasses to take a shower. I might be hungover.
SMOKEY THE BEAR CAME AT US WITH FUCKING AXES IN MY DREAM I THINK IT IS A SIGN TO STOP BLAZING IT IN THE WOODS
i regret nothing
brb throwing up in the dishwasher
i regret everything
I'll accept that I'm a woo girl. Just not the drunk cowboy hat wearing bar mongering twat bag type
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I legit just swiped right with a Tinder feminist just to get in an argument with her. Soo that's my Friday night so far...
You probably shouldn't do that...but if you do take pictures
it was the kind of sex that I don't even know how my hair extentions are still in
I've got a tequila scented hand sanitizer for you.
you're the best roommate i could ever have.
Did you see her happy birthday to emily on facebook? The gist of it is like: hey emily you almost died at birth im glad you didn't. love mom.
ok first of all what the fuck
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