are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
I was just standing there and then BOOM! She was attacking my face with her mouth.
I don't get it, man. She treated me like a sexual predator but treated you like a piece of meat.
Why I am the classiest girl you know: just mixed drinks for everyone on the baby changing station at the movie theater.
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Hooked up with my old baby sitter last night, so what do I do? As I was sucking her tits I decided it would be a good idea to say " goo goo gah gah"....it wasn't a good idea.
woke up in a freezing tub of water at 6 am again. probably should stop the drunk baths
She uses empty wine bottles as book ends. 2 on each side. At least 8 shelves.
Almost thought it was a good idea to call his parents to thank them for having a son with an awesome dick. That high.
At what point should i just give my brother a break and stop sleeping with his friends?
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My period started right as he was entering, which really helped me sell the "I've never done this before" bit.
He passed out in the car on the way to the party. Seabiscuit tripped before the race even started....Lil bitch....
It's like an adderall Houdini. Right when you think you have a deal he disappears
I just want to sit in my tub, drugged out of my mind, and watch the green lantern cartoon while the world as we know it ceases to exist outside my bathroom door, Okay? Is that REALLY too much to ask?
I'm disproportionately drunk. But I also spelled disproportionately right twice so maybe I'm not that drunk
I fuckin love you!
I would reciprocate the feeling if i knew who this was.
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