The mall is playing a fucking country mix of lady marmalade.
welcome to maine.
I glued a penny on the door Tricia believes its Patrick Swayze haunting our apartment. Fuckin potheads.
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
He said he wouldn't use a condom because he didn't want to kill anymore trees.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So glad I decided to show up and puke in your trashcan.
These are the moments that bond souls forever.
What's a good pandora station to masturbate to?
I just don't do feelings in the summer months.
Ugh contemplating vodka and chocolate protein powder as this Capri sun and vodka isn't really cutting it
words I never want to hear dad say again: "Trevor you sexy man you"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Casually blacked out last night and apparently told him he couldn't come back to bed until he got me Taco Bell.
OK... But I need to shower first because I'm covered in stuff I definitely shouldn't have slept in
Hey every now and then can you tell me you want to fuck me to boost my confidence? Thanks.
Its like people have to train for months before they try and drink with us and survive...
So turns out my new assistant isn't really my assistant. The owner needed a title for his FWB so his wife wouldn't catch on. I got a three hundred a month credit limit boost on my corporate credit card instead.
Yep. Just fucked a 34 year old on the football field where we both went to high school. That's a story for the grandkids.
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