Did I get blown in the bathroom? Yes. Did she throw up cranberry juice on my shorts? Yes. Did she finish the job? Yes.
One of my residents in my hall just found my positive pregnancy test from last year I hid behind the fridge, I'm just going to tell them it was for a science project.
They peed on our pledges last night... i dont know if i should put an lol at the end of that or not
I have a critically important question to ask.
Why does watermelon-flavoured candy exist?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you think the party boat will still go out if there is a hurricane?
and hes going back to rehab like me, so we have common interests
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
Our DD has become famous. Strippers are asking to be handcuffed to him.
When our dicks touched he made a lightsaber noise.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did we pole dance in front of my boss last night or was it just me?
How is your new roommate working out
We are drinking at the laundromat. And will probably have sex later. So...pretty good.
So I'm just casually at the grocery store when I remember that there's still a clove of garlic in my vagina
At leat we can cross off 'having sex in a classroom' on our bucket list.
Asking me to suck on my nipples isn't going to make me less mad at you.
Happiness is laying in bed, topless, pouring 4 packs of hot sauce on your taco bell.
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