i just saw a homeless guy running after a pigeon, catch it and put it in his jacket pocket. I'm not sure if the bird is now his pet or dinner!
Omg. Well, welcome to Oakland...
eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
I got groped on the dancefloor by both grooms. I love gay weddings
When the cops knocked on the door, he just knocked back and announced "house keeping"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm sorry but I have to break up with you. My wife is pregnant and can't have a girlfriend too.
I might lose an organ but I've got booze. I'll be fine.
Dude, it's the frankincense and myrrh soap. Smelling like baby Jesus will get you laid.
I need to stop going to bars and yelling "I could be teaching your kids one day, bitches!"
I miss my brother. He would have fucked the fat girl for me.
I told you I would
I wouldnt do that to you. You're my actual friend
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We left his house because I forgot how to drink water, I was just holding it in my mouth and then spitting it out, needless to say I don't remember the sex.
Well, I made it thru a doorway, so I think things are going good.
Well I guess I'll go shower now and wash all the stripper off.
That hot guy just got to class and he's eating a bagel sandwich. I dunno which I'm more attracted to
I threw up in my backpack last night, but at least it wasn't in the pizza box again
Why let a Christmas Eve hangover ruin a perfectly good Christmas Day acid trip?
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