Haym$ered
turn off your phone and go to bed
were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
He invited me to see "alison wonderland" WHAT THE FUCK THATS NOT A FIRST NAME/LAST NAME TYPE DEAL
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
WHY IS MY CAR MISSING A DOOR YOU BITCH
budget cuts
YOU CANT BLAME EVERYTHING YOU DO WHILE DRUNK ON BUDGET CUTS
budget cuts are serious business
No dude, I'm not naming my kid after your beard
I haven't had to masterbate since I started dating him over a year ago. I don't even know if I remember how and my vagina is calling.
This snow needs to melt so I can get wasted on someones front lawn
Saw my drug dealer at Easter mass with his family so that was weird
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's barely past noon, how am I already talking about double penetration
He can't say no, it's my spiritual goddamn quest.
Did we actually play with swords last night or did I dream that?
He eats ass but won’t hold open doors. My kinda guy.
Chivalry really is dead.
Dude, I'm sorry if you saw me getting head in my truck last night. My bad.
i am risking my non lesbian vagina for your needs. i better be the best friend you ever had
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