I'm drunk in f*****g wisconsin and want to kill myself.
If it's any consolation, be grateful that you're not in New Jersey.
i always forget guys have bellybuttons
No, a stripper letting you buy her dinner is not the same as a girlfriend.
i'm pretty sure i'm on the same train we took last friday..
what?how do you know?
it appears they have not cleaned up your vomit yet.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
they told me they were banning four lokos so yeah i did have to buy 42 of them
My nipple rings set off the metal detector at the courthouse this morning.
I'll report later on the progress of the mountain orgy
I'll just tell her I'm here with you picking out a buttplug for her to say "I'm sorry".
My little brother just suggested we drink the rest of the vodka because it's raining. My job is complete.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why the fuck is there a picture of us jumping a girl that's wearing my chicken mask?
No. DON'T DO IT. Friends don't let friends fuck clowns.
I have the liquor shits and this time, it's personal.
I tried to breakup with him by telling I had a threesome. He one upped me by saying he had a 5-some so I couldn’t do it.
When the bouncer doesn't let you in... Don't ask him where he works so you could file a complaint with the better business bureau... It only proves him right.
It's 5 PM...and you're 35. Congrats on being an amazing human being.
He was about to go in...and he fell off the bed. Ruined mood!
Randomize