piano lessons. No girlfriend. What's up.
i wanted to iron the shorts i'm wearing. but i'm high and lazy. so i'm using my hair straightener. in bed.
ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
:( I miss blowjobs.
This is probably the strangest conversational segue we've ever had.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It starts with an S and ends with arah just gave me a bj.
She definitely looked like a troll, but I had take one for the team. Or at least thats what I keep telling myself
It's nights like those I refer to my life motto: You can't be just friends with someone after you've seen their genitals.
My feelings are currently in a sea of vodka and "I don't give a shit"
Aren't they always?
I would fuck him In a heartbeat, an obese child running up stairs with an irregular heartbeat, heartbeat.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We told you to go get more fire wood and you came running back with a log that was on fire, not drunk at all.
Nope, can't do it. It's a snowball effect. Today, leggings as pants. Tomorrow, female hitler. Natural progression.
New guy at work just gave me a Percocet for my headache. Officially best friends
There is not enough whiskey in the world to get me through what happened on Pretty Little Liars tonight.
First world problems.
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
If my one night stand asked me to move in with him right after does it still count as a one nighter?
Randomize