i can juggle bunnies
cool
on fire
Looks like an M-80 went off in a lb. of pastrami
tailgaiting my last final, a perfect sendoff.
I cleared a drunken path to my bed for you. If you hit clothes you've gone too far.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
WHITE RUSSIAN WEDNESDAY. TELL YOUR CO WORKERS. INVITE QND PREPARE
She did my hair, then ate me out. Switching teams was an awesome decision.
I just sit in the cubicle for 8 hours and do keagles.
Cut a hole in the crotch of my onesie so we could have sex without me getting cold. Best decision of my life.
you stole two subs and a drink from jimmy johns and walked out yelling "get at me bitches"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How have I seen you throw up on yourself 3 different times, yet we weren't Facebook friends until I accidentally hooked up with your ex?
I called you a cum goblin in my voicemail. I stand by it.
looked up people from my old yearbooks. 3 ex boyfriends are gay. im getting drunk now.
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
I resent the implication of a jizz addiction
He thought it would be sexy if he found my clothes and dressed me, and it was..until he found a thong under his bed and assumed it was mine. It wasn't
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